I think I’ve had more people ask me if I’ve been to the Heart Attack Grill than any other place recently, I’m not sure if it’s because the premise is so ridiculous or it’s just that high of a profile compared to other locations in town lately. Fremont Street is one of my favorite places in Vegas, and the silly theme aside, if there was a good burger for me to eat there it just became that much better. Well there already is, but I could use another. I’ve been slightly avoiding the place both because of my diet I’m trying to maintain, but more importantly because they make you wear a hospital gown when you go in. So are the insanely high calories and embarrassing outfits worth it?
Heart Attack is located in the failed but slowly reviving Neonopolis at the east end of Fremont, and is hopefully part of a trend of new restaurants opening up at this end of the street with a few other locations. You’ve probably read or heard about the gimmicks here where if you weigh over 350 pounds you eat for free, etc so I won’t get too much into that. Plus you can read all about it on their website. The interior carries some of the doctor/naughty nurse theme with scales, plenty of red and white, and lots of TV screens showing media related clips of the restaurant and music videos. And let me note that while I was in there I heard some fantastic tracks.
The menu here is extremely simple, and focuses solely on the unhealthy; single burgers all the way up to quadruple, extra heaps of bacon, soda, buttermilk shakes, candy cigarettes and the like. The pictures of the burgers on the menu don’t look like anything special, so I really didn’t know what to expect, and with all the people asking my opinion of the place I wasn’t sure if they knew something about the burger or they were just preoccupied with the sexy nurses that sit with you while you eat…
Turns out the nurses are quite friendly, but this is a burger review so I’ll try to stay focused as I should have when my burger arrived. I was a bit distracted by Nurse Stephanie, but I can tell you that the burger wasn’t too great. The patty seemed to be of the frozen variety, with typical beefy flavor and cooked more than I’d like but probably enough for this type of patty. The bun was nothing special, there were two large slices of tomato, and some sloppily-placed grilled onions that could have used a bit longer on the grill or some more seasoning. But again, I’m sure you’re not coming here for the burger, just like you’re not going to Hooters for the wings. Oh, and don’t tell Stephanie I mentioned that “H” word in this article, she got very mad at me when I mentioned it to her.
The fries I must mention, they were fantastic. I’m not sure if it’s the butterfat that they’re fried in, but they were better than most I’ve had lately. Thick, big, cooked well…everything I’ve been wanting from places that have given me great burgers and nothing else. I was also talked into a buttermilk chocolate shake, as my only alternatives were soda, beer or water. It was of the better shakes I’ve had, even though the slice of butter on top was a tad scary.
If you’re judging this place exclusively on the burger as this blog aims to do, then I don’t suggest eating here. But if you’re looking for a really fun time, some sexy nurses and some unhealthy food then this is your spot on Fremont.