Burger Boy put it best, if a place claims to be the ‘World’s Greatest’ it is typically a recipe for disaster. That’s about what I expected as I walked in to Farmer Boys and took a quick look around their restaurant. Cheesy décor, white trash…have I just arrived in NASCAR heaven? I must say though, this ended up being a little better than I thought.
The interior of this restaurant screams ‘country kitchen’, the décor is complete with awful ceiling fans, floral patterns on awful fabrics, wooden trellises, fake plants, and milk jugs. It felt like someone threw up every awful bit of Homegoods into this place. And to make matters worse, I think every child and adult eating here was at least 30-40 pounds heavier than what they should be. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten the feeling that I actually stepped down a social class walking into a burger joint, even at McDonald’s, but this place somehow did it for me. It’s like the Wal-Mart of burger joints. So all that being said, if you’re looking for a classy joint, read no further. And screw you if you think I’m judgmental.
This is a fast food burger joint, but to make it feel a bit more ‘fancy’ like some other places, once you place your order you are given a number to take to your table. Only such classy places as Carl’s Jr do things like that. The burger took about 5-7 minutes to arrive at my table which isn’t bad, and supposedly because each one is cooked to order.
There are many menu options including a Farmer’s Burger, which comes with bacon, avocado, thousand island and various toppings, but at 1196 calories I decided to pass on that and go with the Farmer’s Classic Double. This burger consists of two 1/8lb patties, American cheese, thousand island, and your standard lettuce, tomato, two dill pickle slices and onions. Everything there is pretty much standard including the plain bun, but the onions were thinly sliced, almost shoestring, doused with thousand island and were a nice touch. I typically don’t like too much onion on my burger as it can take away from other flavors, but these were pretty good.
The patties were actually decent, for fast food I would feel safe eating them on their own similar to an In-N-Out patty, unlike one from McDonald’s or some other places. Not sure if it was real, but it had a really good char flavor to it, dare I say better than Burger King’s, and eerily reminiscent to Harvey’s which I miss dearly from my childhood. There was even some pink in the middle of my thin patties, I’m not sure if that was intentional or not because you will never find anything like that in similar fast food places, but I’m brave so I ate it without a worry. Not sure if my stomach ache 30 minutes later was because of this or just the meal in general.
The fries were nothing great, thicker than most typical fast food choices, but not any better. Your standard frozen stadium fries more or less. I still somehow found myself eating almost all of them, and there were a good amount to go with my burger.
And now for what is usually the determining factor for whether I give a place an ok score or not: the value. My entire meal of a double burger, fries and a drink only cost $5.39, which is cheaper than my coveted In-N-Out double double meal, although not quite as good. Still, considering the poor atmosphere and mediocre fries, this is actually a good deal. You can definitely do much worse for a fast food burger and easily pay a lot more. Hell, this is a bargain compared to that overrated crap you get at Five Guys. Granted it is fast food and should almost not even be considered on this blog, but I walked away far happier than anticipated so I won’t complain. So if you’re looking for something quick, cheap and decent, then by all means don’t be afraid to eat at Farm Boys burger alongside some mullet-sporting white trash diners.